Thursday, April 13, 2006

Why Don't You...

…just switch off your television set and go and do something less boring instead?” Remember that theme song? The presenters (granted, they were kids) never seemed to catch on to the irony that they were presenting a television programme during the school holidays that encouraged kids NOT to watch television during the school holidays but instead, go off and make space rockets out of toilet rolls and the like.

And was it just me or did the very early episodes include some mystical creature called “a doris”? My recollection is that it looked a bit like a long furry duster for blinds and shot about the place at incredible speeds. I realise my memories might be warped by spending much of my early years partying with Drew Barrymore but I’d be comforted to learn if anyone else remembers this.

Anyway, got any plans for the four-day holiday weekend? If the weather keeps you in, forget about any fancy blog redesigns and RSS feeds and tags and links and all that other bollocks techie people love to tell you about. Here’s a fun thing to do with your computer instead.

Take a post-it note (any colour), fold it in half (and NO, it doesn’t matter if it’s folded longways or otherwise you OCD freaks), fold it in half again, insert it into the space between the keys on your keyboard and drag it along to the end of the row. Repeat several times for each row and see how much crap comes out the other end.

When I tried this at the weekend, I turned up enough crisps, corn flakes, rice and chocolate sprinkles to keep a small Vietnamese family well fed for an entire week. As for the human hair that emerged, well my pal Bruce has claimed the lot and is weaving himself a nice toupee as we speak.

Nice eh?


At 13/4/06 10:22 pm, Blogger Green Glass Beads said...

Happy birthday, oh happy birthday is on it' wayyyayaya YEAH!
I also cleaned my keyboard. My work keyboard. Not nice. So you comin over for your birthday? Will it be a race against time to see which will happen first...birthday or Neil's visit or Saidhbhin feckin off to Scotland?

At 13/4/06 10:38 pm, Blogger Gordon said...

Bloody amateurs.

Tip the damn thing upside down and give it a couple of sharp raps on the desk. THEN you'll see what crap you've got in yer keyboard.

And admit it. Some of those hairs didnae come fae yer heid! (don't worry, it's a well know, if little understood phenomonenoenon.. thing.. no-one knows how they get there... but there are plenty of theories..)

At 15/4/06 1:37 am, Anonymous wendi said...

your birthdays acomin?!?!? exciting...and yes...airfare is MUCH cheaper to chicago...

At 16/4/06 10:31 am, Blogger Gunnella said...

Birthday ... ;-) Party ? :-D

At 16/4/06 5:16 pm, Blogger Neil said...

Sai - Can't come over for my birthday; too much keyboard cleaning to do. Will arrange date soon.

Gordon - You mean pubic rather than animal, right?

Wendi - Yep, birthday imminent. Partay in Az. Interested?

Gunnella - I'm not a big fan of party organising but if you're offering...??? By the way, we should have lunch sometime since we work in the same city!

At 16/4/06 10:36 pm, Anonymous wendi said...

you flying me out?

At 13/6/06 1:39 pm, Anonymous Julia said...

I remember Doris in this context, and was looking on the net to see if anyone else did. I remember exactly as you described the long 'feather boa' like object (I think it was brown) shot along the edges of things like tables and chairs and disappeared.


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