Thursday, March 02, 2006

Hell, YEAH! Do It!

I buy the newspaper every day but to be honest, I don’t really read it. The words are a bit small and I’m usually too engrossed in the pictures. However on Tuesday, I happened to notice a letter (copied verbatim below) which had been sent to the resident agony aunt.

I know it’s not big or clever to laugh at other people’s problems but frankly, I thought this was feckin’ hilarious… especially if it’s true.

I am a 17-year-old student living away from home with my mates. I don’t have a lot of money and debts are crippling me. I went out last week, got drunk and ended up sleeping with what can only be described as a “big” woman. I admit I made a mistake.

After our session, I went to the kitchen for a drink and she asked me for a bag of crisps. My mates were in the flat and overheard her saying this. Now they won’t stop making fun of me.

They are offering to help pay off my debts if I sleep with her again. It’s very tempting so what should I do?

The “aunt’s” reply advised against it, citing the old chestnuts of ‘self respect’ and ‘so-called friends’, and ended up suggesting (somewhat churlishly I thought) “getting a part-time job for extra cash”. Duh-huh!


At 8/3/06 9:07 am, Blogger Gordon said...

Get a job and lose the opportunity of a lifetime? No no no.

You don't want to start the poor lad down the path to 9 to 5 drudgery... instead show him the riches on offer for being a man-hooker!

I mean if he can get his debts cleared by sleeping with one women... how long before he has a Morningside apartment with a Ferrari parked outside!


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