Friday, September 02, 2005

What The F...?

There are some things you should probably never do drunk. Texting ex partners with garbled words of undying devotion is probably one. Agreeing with your pal’s encouraging noises to climb into a field full of farm animals is probably another. Blogging when you can’t coherent a sentence type is a definite no-no but what the hell. It’s late on a Friday, I’ve staggered home from the pub after a busy working week and frankly, I don’t give a flying fuck so tell me this… what the hell is going on New Orleans???

How the hell can people die when they know a hurricane is heading their way?

How can a President drop in the words “worse than 9/11” in a rare television interview when talking about a “natural” disaster? (I might have missed it but I’m pretty sure he was keen to avoid using the phrase “act of God” in case the majority of his voters shifted even further to the right.)

Please, PLEASE tell me you’re not so insular a country that you haven’t heard of a place called Florida where hurricanes have been known to cause an incident or two in the past? I’m thousands of miles away and even I know they had four big hits last year.

I ask you again. What the FUCK were you doing in a city (a city that sits BELOW sea level and is surrounded by flood barriers) waiting for a hurricane to come? What were the authorities doing to alert you?

All of this escapes me. I’m at a loss for words. You have a Weather Channel. You have News Channels. I know for a fact that as a nation you like watching television. If you had an Al Qaeda Channel and for three or four days beforehand you could track the progress of a hijacked plane heading to your neighbourhood, would you stay in that neighbourhood? I’m sorry but I just don’t get it. It doesn’t compute.

I loved my visit to N’awlins last year. Granted, I stayed in the touristy bits most of the time but nevertheless, it was a very memorable three days or so. As I said, I’m a bit too drunk to rationalise any sensible thoughts about it but perhaps that’s because it makes no sense at all to me. If I’m missing anything obvious please let me know.

Night (hic) Night!


At 3/9/05 7:01 am, Anonymous Donna said...

Astounding, isn't it? It's like those people in Amityville that stayed for something like 13 days when the demonic voice in the house where an entire family had been murdered said, "GET OUT!"

Having said that, there were reasons why some people stayed behind. They had no transportation out of town and nowhere else to go. Now it wouldn't have stopped me because I would have started walking or something but some of those people are desperately poor. Some of them, though, chose to stay.

I'm a Texan and I knew that town was below sea level. I knew they relied constantly on pumps and levees to contain all that water. I knew their levees were only built to withstand a Category 3 hurricane. I knew Katrina was predicted to hit NOLA dead-on and was at Category 5 at that time. They knew it, too. They just must have thought they were 10-foot tall & bullet-proof.

Our town (small town, far north of Dallas) has about 50 families that WERE smart enough to heed the warnings and get the hell out of town. They thought they'd shack up with friends & family for a couple of days then go back and pick up the tree limbs and roofing shingles. Imagine their shock and surprise when they figured out this was going to be their new home for a good while.

We have a small house sitting empty, trying to sell it, and we're letting a family stay there for a few months. Might as well do some good with those mortgage payments we're making anyway, right?

Neil, have another drink for me. I need one after watching this mess unfold on TV.

Best regards to you - thanks for the fun stuff to read. And I'd like to think my previous post to you inspired choice #3 on your latest survey. If I wasn't your inspiration please just keep that to yourself. No need to disillusion me further today.

p.s. If you've sold either your Miracle 2-Stick Lollie/Popsicle or your leftover Christmas Pudding-Flavored Kit Kats perhaps you could donate those proceeds to the Red Cross. They might be able to put all that cash to good use and get someone a partially consumed bottle of flat soda or something.

At 3/9/05 9:11 pm, Blogger carl said...

I have no idea what the fuck they were thinking in NOLA. Damned bunch of toothless, red-necked, hill-billied, typed ass-holes anyway---and I'm talking about the emergency system. At a certain point they should have locked the town down and evac'ed everyone, via cart, mule, tricycle or on foot. I don't give a shit. And those that refused to leave...well FUCK those stupid bastards and let God deal with them.

As for President Bush saying it is 'worse than 9/11' that is just political-speak for 'don't blame me 'cuz I didn't make anyone stay behind.' Guess he has to play up the disaster to make these stupid fucks feel as if they aren't at fault for deciding to stay put during a Catagory 5 hurricane, in a town with levees designed for a Catagory 3 hurricane.

As for me I worked for the Red Cross as a paid instructor for 10-years. I quit right after 9/11. Thats because the son-of-a-bitches at National Red Cross headquarters TOOK all the moneys we raised in our area and decided afterwords that only 10% of it would go to the 9/11 event. Once bitten, twice shy. The other 90% was ear-marked for 'other disaster relief.' So fuck the Red Cross in their arse as far as I am concerned. I wouldn't give them a red-cent because I don't trust them.

Finally, I don't believe the stories of people taking shots at National Guard Helicopters. If that were to happen, and mind you it's Martial Law, those fuck-head would he shredded meat by the gunner on board that slick. Period. So I have stopped watching the news. I'm sticking with the Cartoon Network for the next couple of week.

At 4/9/05 5:51 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Neil -

This is why they stayed:


At 4/9/05 9:29 pm, Blogger Neil said...

Kat - As I said, you should never blog drunk. A lot of similar stories have been in the press here over the weekend so I felt a bit stupid that beer could dilute my ranting to such a simplistic level.

Donna - The proceeds from the Kit Kats and the miracle popsicle are making poverty history as we speak. You were indeed my inspiration for #3 - then again, Texan girls always seem to have an inspirational effect on me.

At 5/9/05 3:32 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...


This comment piece tries to answer some of the questions you raise and some you don't:,16441,1562901,00.html


At 5/9/05 6:31 pm, Blogger DC said...


You're old enough , big enough, ugly enough, and certainly been drunk enough to know that beer doesn't always dilute ranting/thought processes . Rather it can elevate you to a selfprofessed world expert on any given subject, particularly politics, religion,world events,sport,ladies and fashion.

Sure you can blame Stella, but your comments were from the heart & what you were feeling at that time- no need to feel stupid.Quiet & sober reflection can put things in some kind of context.

Perhaps you could develop this approach & do a before, ( ie, sober), blog on any given subject Followed by one after a couple of beers, a few wines( red and white),a couple more beers, some Highland Park, more beer & a wee Highland Park for the road/ditch/blog- with maybe a beer to keep it company? It could make interesting reading, although the latter may be short & sweet:

" Stuff world poverty/ global warming. I want pizza( & more beer) !

Night (hic) Night!"


At 5/9/05 9:36 pm, Blogger Neil said...

Donald - when you're right, you're right. Beer DOES make me an expert on most subjects. I've just come back from a Monday happy hour and find myself with all manner of worldly views on the subject matters you've outlined. Do you think if I drink enough I'll be able to attempt telling jokes?

At 6/9/05 11:57 am, Blogger DC said...



More beer = really funny.


At 6/9/05 11:00 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heya Neil,
Regardless of people´s reasons to stay in NO, I still get the distinct impression that there were many who either didn´t understand fully, or couldn´t leave without help. So I am inclined to agree with your amazement of the whole thing. I was gonna say let´s hope everyone gets the help they need, but that´s pretty stupid of me. SO I won´t.
Hope you´re well. Look up I´ll write about it soon


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