Sunday, January 14, 2007

There Are Children Here, I Can Smell Them

Two years ago today, my brother Stuart (the internet genius who is STILL available for all manner of freelance website work so he can afford passage for himself and his eldest son on a cargo ship to the New World to attend the wedding of our other brother in Texas at the end of March) created this blog for me and regular readers will be well aware that it hasn’t changed one bit since. That’s because I have no clue what he did to bring it all together and am scared sh#tless about messing with anything in case it all goes t#ts up.

For example, now that Bob Geldof and Bill Gates have solved all the world’s poverty problems, I’d quite like to remove that little banner in the top right hand corner which is just SOOO 2005. I’d also quite like to get that photograph at the top fixed since my original blueprint for the blog demanded that the PHOTO should age, whilst I remain forever 39. Whilst Stuart aims to correct matters by wrestling with the troublesome problems associated with folding time and space, I have another predicament about which I’d like some constructive advice.

Every time I go to the Blogger website to log on now, I’m confronted with a barrage of messages advising me to change to some new version of Blogger. The messages are filled with confusing doubletalk like ‘drag-and-drop template editing’, ‘privacy controls’ and ‘new post labels’, although the one offering ‘more feed options’ got my heart racing a little faster. They also state that if I go along with this undoubted scam, my account will be converted seamlessly into a Google Account.

Now I don’t know about you but all of this just makes me think that I’m being seduced by the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang – “Come along kiddie-winkies, I have lollypops” – so since I’m only two years old here, I need somebody to tell me what to do.

Has anyone undergone this ‘conversion’? Is it any good? Is it easy to do? Will the content and layout really not change? Will I have to wear a red piece of string round my wrist and go to church with Tom Cruise? Does Google really have lollypops? Are you able to talk freely about it or are did you end up getting chained to a rock in the damp caverns beneath the fairytale castle?

Any and all helpful advice gratefully received.

11 Comments:

At 15/1/07 8:11 am, Blogger Lesley said...

I'm just like Lynette's boys (that's an obscure intellectual illusion for those of you who don't get it), when the man in the car said he had lollypops, I jumped in. No problems so far although I may have signed a contract that included the words "soul" and "eternity".

 
At 15/1/07 10:47 am, Blogger Donald said...

Neil,

Do nothing.

DC

 
At 15/1/07 4:54 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

what ever you do...DO NOT make the conversion...i've heard horror stories...

your faithful texas friend,
Wendi

angelwithanattitude31 at yahoo

 
At 16/1/07 1:11 am, Blogger Kell said...

OK, first of all, I'm going to have nightmares thinking about the Child Catcher. That guy still gives me the willies.

Second, I haven't converted yet mainly because I'm too lazy. My brother swears it's very easy to change and he likes the new version, but he knows a lot more than I do about these things. I read somewhere that eventually, we'll all have to move over to new blogger.

 
At 16/1/07 4:39 am, Blogger Betty said...

Come on, Neil. If an old lady like me can do it, you can do it. I like Beta Blogger, actually, although I did have to have a bit of help from my son - ok a LOT of help from my son. But, it is easier to use in many ways. Seriously, if you really do need help, Jay at cynicalbstd.blogspot.com can help.

 
At 16/1/07 7:47 am, Blogger Peggy said...

As a blogger with NO knowledge of html, I managed the conversion to New Blogger (Blogger beta as it was) with just a few hiccups. I will say that the hiccups were Blogger related and not due to my own dunderheadedness.

You can always ask for help from any of the computer geniuses that were at the last blogmeet.

Join the dark side!

 
At 16/1/07 5:42 pm, Blogger Helena said...

Go on - you know you want to! I quite like the new version and swapped without much ado. My only complaint is that sometimes the word verification doesn't show the letters. That besides, it's business as usual.

 
At 16/1/07 5:46 pm, Blogger Helena said...

Go on - you know you want to! I quite like the new version and swapped without much ado. My only complaint is that sometimes the word verification doesn't show the letters. That besides, it's business as usual.

 
At 16/1/07 11:08 pm, Blogger Neil said...

Hmmm... interesting comments. Those of you advocating the 'conversion' remind me a bit of that girl at the end of 'Invasion Of The Bodysnatchers'.. perfectly normal on the outside but more than a slight faraway look in your eyes. You almost had me convinced until Lena made the criminal error of extoling her position twice.. classic dark side slip up. I'll stick with my Texan and Nebraskan friends meantime.

 
At 17/1/07 8:19 pm, Blogger Helena said...

Well, if it's gonna happen to anybody.........*sigh*

 
At 24/1/07 12:39 am, Blogger Green Glass Beads said...

I'm converted! I'm a born again blogger! True, it took feckin 2 months to do, but finally it works. I notice my blog publishes easily and more quickly. Other than that I also noticed that you cannot view some people's blogs if you HAVEN'T switched over, which is a large part of the reason that I switched. I resisted but then my friends went over to the dark side and how could I resist?

 

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