Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Even Better If She Turns Into A Pizza Afterwards

I’ve finally figured out why I’ve been unemployed for so long... I keep getting asked the same think-outside-the-box-moral-dilemma question at interviews and I’ve just realised that my innovative solution isn’t going down too well with the questioners. How would you answer the following conundrum I wonder?

You’re driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and see three people waiting for a bus:

1. An old lady who looks as if she’s about to die.
2. An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you’ve been dreaming about all your life.

You can only fit one passenger in your small car so which one would you offer a ride to?

You could pick up the old lady because she’s going to die thus saving her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.

Having researched the correct answer on the internet I now appreciate that I would’ve gained more during the interviews by giving up my stubborn, outdated thought limitations and answering, “I would hand the car keys to my old friend and let him take the old lady to the hospital. I would then stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.”

Instead of which I’ve been banging on about running down the old lady to put her out of her misery, followed immediately by sex with the perfect partner on the bonnet of my car and then driving off with the old friend for a few beers. DOH!


At 17/1/07 8:35 pm, Blogger Lena said...

You mean you wouldn't invite your dream woman along for a few beers with you, too? And I can't say much for her either if she's happy to be had over the bonnet! Real class insist on the back seat!

With questions like these I can't imagine what industry your seeking employment in.....*ahem* but I preferred your answers anyhow!

At 18/1/07 10:55 am, Blogger DC said...

Soaps, What's wrong with the " Do nothing and keep driving" answer.It'd be far less complicated.

Anyway, what kind of stupid question is that anyway?What is wrong with questions like:

1. Do you want the job?

2. Will you turn up on time ?

3. Will you turn up?

4. Will you cause problems with other staff?

5. Will you fart about chatting all day?

6. Will you spend most of the working day checking out the available talent & hit on them at any opportunity?

7. Will you embark on a seedy, messy & ackward affair with one of your co-workers, wich is, of course , doomed to failure?

8. If you saw me in a pub, slumped in a drunken stupor, would you:

a) Buy me another pint.

b) Suggest that I'd maybe had enough & might wish to consider calling it a night.

c) Ignore me & check out whether there was any talent worth hitting on.

d) Call Big Al & yer man Poochie & indulge in a marathon all-night drinking session( 3 Miller Drafts & 2 M&P's for you).

Think carefully about your answers - they be trick questions!

Good Luck.


At 18/1/07 11:21 am, Blogger Neil said...

Lena - The car has no back seat 'cause IT CAN ONLY TAKE ONE PASSENGER. Thank you for your interest in the vacancy however....

Donald - If I saw you in a pub slumped in a drunken stupor I would (e) do what I normally do and tell you to hurry up 'cause we've still got the second half of the gig to play. And turn that f#cking bass down!

At 18/1/07 4:57 pm, Blogger Lena said...

ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! DON'T SHOUT AT ME, NEIL! I typed 'the' back seat, instead of 'a' back seat but if you want to be so pedantic among friends........*sniff*. It was Wednesday the 17th, yesterday anyhow..........!


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