Monday, October 15, 2007

Hole In My Life / Driven To Tears

23 years, 10 months and 7 days after last seeing them play, the big day finally arrives for me to hop into my car and head south of the border to see The Police play in Manchester tonight. Only… I’m still at home because 23 years, 10 months and 6 days after last seeing them play, I get an email from their website telling me the Manchester shows are cancelled because Sting is “suffering from a throat infection”. A fucking throat infection, Jesus! Shoulda reached for the Lem-Sip instead of doing all that fucking yoga, you auld git.

If you know me at all, you will understand why it’s probably not a good idea to call or talk to me today but if you’re swithering – perhaps thinking that dropping off a sponge cake might be the tonic to cheer up - I suggest you look up “totally fucked off” in the dictionary where you’ll find the definition “Neil… 15/10/07… back away slowly. Then run. Like the wind.”

Anyway, at least I’m not at work. Although if I can find my box of doughnuts, that might not be a bad idea…


A quick apology to my Uncle Hamish & Auntie Annie in Illinois. Earlier this year when I met them at my brother’s wedding in Austin, they politely informed me that they have, on occasion, enjoyed the writing “but honestly Neil, there’s a bit too much bad fucking language in it for our taste.” I might be paraphrasing but you get the gist so sorry for the cussing. I will strive to do better. Just not today.

7 Comments:

At 15/10/07 1:05 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

there's a littl eblack spot in the sun today

 
At 15/10/07 1:08 pm, Blogger Helena said...

Oh, Neil! What with the Signals' gig not recording, an original companion choice (me - I was 2nd on the list for this gig) having to spend time (and dosh) on 'unforseen' 18th anniversary plans in 2 days' time....and now this beauty! You deserve it, mate, you really don't! I'm sending big hugs to you and a packet of Soothers to Sting - the big wimp. He could have mimed!

 
At 15/10/07 1:22 pm, Blogger Helena said...

Actually, Neil, I've been trying to mail a comment to you 8 times now but every time I was hitting 'publish' I was taken off the Internet and straight back to desktop.
The Gremlins are out to get me, too today, but you're ones are wearing boots, I know!

ps.....that above comment should read 'DON'T deserve it, BTW...!

 
At 15/10/07 3:07 pm, Blogger Peggy said...

I just heard the news (I know I'm a bit behind the times) and I immeditately thought how crushed you will be. I'm so sorry!

Please don't be too down, I'm sure they will re-schedule.

 
At 15/10/07 3:19 pm, Blogger Kell said...

I'm so sorry--that's just awful.

 
At 15/10/07 6:14 pm, Blogger Donald said...

Soaps, that's gotta hurt, especially since you lost "all that weight" to fit into your original Police sleeveless T shirt & your really cool jacket.

Stingy- what a ponce. You could excuse old Andy Summers , because, well, he's old. If the Stingster stopped showing off his well toned bod & wearing a vest as an outer rather than an undergarment, perhaps with a nice wee scarf - he wouldn't now need to look nervously up at every high building .

Have you shaved your head yet? Has the special telescopic eqiupment arrived? Have you really changed your name to Lee-Harvey Surlan?

 
At 16/10/07 8:36 am, Blogger Neil said...

You're all very kind, thank you. I'm managing to hang in there...

 

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